Rsvp Is Not Negotiable | The Thirty Something Bride

follow friday #3

Every Friday Twitter is peppered with the #FF hashtag. It stands for “Follow Friday.” It’s a great way to find new bloggers and vendors, but sometimes I have no idea WHY I should follow someone. I’ve started this series to introduce you to wedding bloggers I think you should follow. They’re the best, hippest, smartest, and most talented wedding bloggers on the web. Meet Louise from the Thirty Something Bride…

what i love about the thirty something bride

I love two things about Louise:

First, I love her ability to balance “straight shooting” wedding advice with respect for her readership. Louise describes herself as snarky, and, well, she kinda is. At the same time, Louise ALWAYS has an open mind about other people’s experiences. She honors her readers’ differences in opinion and respectfully engages with her readers in the comments.

Two, I love the philosophy behind her accessory business TruLu Couture. Louise is trained in Couture Fashion Construction. Everything she sews is perfectly done. When it comes to sewing and fashion, Louise is anti-glue gun. This means any accessories she makes will last and last. Louise is also committed to “creating couture designs using vintage materials as a part of the reduce, reuse, recycle and upcycle movement.” What that means is Louise can take your mother’s or grandmother’s heirloom veil or dress and create something custom for you and your wedding. LOVE!

what you’ll love about the 30-something bride

Wedding planning can be fun, but it can also be frustrating: Oh, maid of honor, you decided two weeks before the big day that you really CAN’T afford to come to my wedding? Super. I know you’re paying for the wedding Mom, but I don’t want the reception at the Country Club; I want it in the park. Please! When you’re a bride, everything seems to be a process of negotiation, and it can be frustrating to hear everyone’s unfiltered opinion about your wedding.

Louise is your inner voice when you are frustrated with the whole process. She bandies the word douchebag around like its a prepositional phrase. Why? Because some people ARE douchebags, and while you may not be able to call your MOH a douchebag to her face, it’s cathartic to see Louise perfectly state that if it looks like a duck and walks like a duck….

Louise also publishes beautiful “Un-Fake” weddings. Because, as Louise puts it, she’s “always been confused about ‘real weddings’ on blogs. What else would they be? Fake?” Her un-fake interviews are amaze-balls too. She asks about choosing vendors, what the bride would change and why, and, my favorite question: “Wedding night…did you or didn’t you?”

OK, without further adieu… here’s my interview with Louise.

Philosophy toward selecting weddings for publication: The feature needs to be both educational and emotional. Yes, I want to show eye candy/details, but more importantly, I want readers to be able to connect on some level – either through a DIY aspect, budget, (high or low), style, heart-strings, location…something. When I review a wedding, I need to feel something about it myself for me to post it. It can be one picture, or one comment from the bride…something that makes me think that someone else will connect as well.

My blog in one word: Snarky.

My blog is known for: Straight shooting wedding and marriage advice…. as I figure it out.

What’s the first thing someone should do when they find your blog? Comment. Then share with your friends. Then keeping reading and keep commenting.

What’s your online go-to source for inspiration? I love Moment Junkie. It reminds us that weddings aren’t just about tablescapes.

Trend I’m loving right now: Wedding dress back detail.

Trend I’d never publish: Kardashian anything.

Who’s your biggest blogger crush, and why? Another Damn Life (Lyn), because she has mad writing skillz.

Personally, what was the most difficult aspect of wedding planning? Dealing with all the family shit; worrying about hurting people’s feelings, then not caring at all and actually hurting them.

How did you overcome it? I don’t think I did it well. I had some heated conversations and WPM (Wedding Planning Meltdowns). It ended up OK, but my “hindsight” advice is to be more open and honest about your wants and desires as a bride, versus assuming that people magically know what you want/expect.

If you could only choose one key wedding detail for your wedding, what would it be? I LOVED my made-for-my-wedding chargers.

Biggest turn on: Honesty in all things regarding self….don’t be afraid to be who your are!

Biggest turn off: Feet

Best [hindsight] advice for weddings: Chill the fuck out and do your best to explain your bridal wants, needs and desires to your friends and family sooner rather than later. A wise planner once told me that the absolute worst trait in the people closest to the bride will show itself during the planning process. This is SO TRUE and I wish I’d known it before I started planning!

You’d be surprised to know that though I’m tall, I have relatively small feet in comparison.

Your favorite place in the world is The Carolina Low Country.

I’m totally addicted to sugar-free Crystal Light knock-offs.

I love wearing waist-hugging tops.

To relax, I take hot baths and read. Don’t loan me a book, it will be returned, but destroyed by bathwater.

My personal theme song is Just Can’t Get Enough by Yaz.

I especially love writing about informational stuffs that educate brides.

I love to collect vintage lace.

I believe a party is party when the old folks start do the booty shake dance.

When I’m not blogging I’m sewing TruLu Couture stuff.

Etiquette rule everyone should know: The RSVP card is NOT negotiable. I don’t care who you are, how close you are, how the bride “knows” you’re coming or whatever. You fill the SOB out and send it back. The effort was made to send you an invitation, the least you can do is send the RSVP back in the time indicated.

Etiquette Rule that should go by the wayside: The receiving line is LAME.

My instant pick me up is a pedicure.

My writing style comes from the fact that there is no filter between my brain and my typing fingers.

The secret to great marriage is honesty and open communication.